For those of you who didn’t get the memo, it is currently the Year of Wendy. At some point as I hurtled toward what seemed like the magical age of 42 I decided it was time to press the reset button and take some time out to work out where I was headed in life. I completely stole the idea from a dear friend, who due to her own circumstances had given herself permission to have her own Year. It seemed like a fitting way for me to begin my forty second year on this earth, and so I declared 19 June to be the beginning of mine.
So far the Year of Wendy has looked a lot like me sitting in cafe’s with my crochet hook in hand. Since finishing formal employment and exploring what it would mean to be a full time Civil Celebrant, I have also given myself permission to sit with a hook and ball of yarn and crochet. I find it a wonderful repetitive task that allows me to slow down, contemplate aspects in my life, and end up with a finished product that people (hopefully) appreciate.
I have even started a new Instagram account (look up @indigograce_crochet) so I could connect with other crafters with minimal bore to my friends and family on my other account.
When talking to my brother over the phone a few weeks back he had obviously noticed my increased volume of crochet products, and related discussion on social media. There may have been some concern that I was under some delusion that I could make money out of it. Let’s be very clear – THERE IS NO MONEY IN THIS CROCHET STUFF! A beanie that I make and sell for $15-20 takes me a minimum of 2 solid hours to make, half a ball of yarn (sometimes more) and is interspersed throughout my day with other things. Apparently even though its the Year of Wendy I am still expected to do certain mundane tasks around the house to ensure it runs in its standard messy smoothness we have become accustomed to. So essentially a beanie that I sell for $15-20 actually takes me all day in between other tasks. Probably not something we can rely on to pay the electricity bill any time soon, though I could possibly argue it pays for my coffee bill. Still, I do love making them, and selling them gives me a little internal happy dance that will keep me going until the power goes out.
So what else does the Year of Wendy look like? So far it has involved:
- moments of mild panic – when I realise I don’t technically EARN any money right now.
- moments of peace – lets face it, its pretty peaceful on a school/work day when everyone’s out of the house except me.
- moments of rejection – I’ve tried for a few ‘very casual’ jobs to keep some income coming in, rejected by all applications so far.
- moments of doubt – have I made a big mistake here? Following my dreams at the possible detriment to other members of my family?
- moments of mild depression – its a big thing to make changes at 42 – surely I should have my act together by now? (so GenX)
However, I know that the Year has only just begun. I am trying to allow myself a little transition period before I look toward the next wedding season, more training to give myself the skills to do a wider range of Celebrant work, and the knowledge (and hope) that something will come along to help us financially through this period. I’m lucky to have a wonderful supportive partner, and friends and family who encourage the risk taking, soul searching behaviours. And in the mean time, I have an order of baby blankets and beanies to fill, but that’s for another blog 🙂